Customer Reviews:
Create Irresistible Positive Feedback for Virtuous Success.......2004-09-22
As a management consultant, I am always asking our clients and potential clients what their major issues are. It almost always boils down to persuading someone else to change. In many situations, the person describes the situation as getting worse rather than better.
As I ask more questions, I soon learn that the person I am talking to is totally thinking about the issue from her or his perspective, not the perspective of the person they want to influence. Carnegie describes a situation where he and his son couldn't get a calf into the barn. They pushed and pulled, and nothing worked. A maid came out, stuck her finger into the calf's mouth to simulate feeding and the calf followed her right into the barn.
As you can tell from that example, Carnegie is a student of the stimulus-response school of human behavior. The book is divided into four sections: Handling People; Getting People to Like You; Getting People to Agree with You; and Being a Leader. Each section is comprised of a few principles, which are each exemplified in a short chapter with a number of examples. Handling people has to do with avoiding the negative and unpleasant, appreciating the other person, and making the other person eager to accomplish some goal of their own.
Each section follows the same format. Basically, it's the same way that you train any living being. You provide positive feedback to the person which makes them feel better, the person responds positively to you making you feel better, you then help the other person to link what you want to share with them with something they want.
Many people will be offended by this idea. I have long studied that reaction and find that it relates to one of two basic assumptions: (1) the decision to act should be based on the objective merits (if I deal with emotions, I am being manipulative) or (2) I want you to acknowledge that I am right, that you are wrong, and that I am superior to you because I am right. Both of those perspectives get in the way of establishing warm human relationships. If you would rather do things without emotion, your life will be very dull. If you would always like to be right, you will be very lonely (even if you really are right).
Let's look at a more fundamental question. Can these techniques be used for questionable purpoes? Probably, is my answer. However, at some point, the person's manipulative game will be found out. See Robert Cialdini's book, Influence, on what happens to smugglers of influence over time.
The best results will come from those who have integrity and are principled. They and everyone else can see that they are pursuing something with another person that is in the best interests of that person, and that there are no hidden agendas. Here is where I think Carnegie is a little weak. You get the impression from the book that hidden agendas are okay. My experience is that all agendas should be totally upfront. Don't pretend you are trying to help someone, when all you are trying to do is sell them something they don't need. Do encourage them to get the information they need to make a good decision for themselves about your idea, product, or service. Leave the whole circumstance with a stronger, more trustworthy relationship than you started with. That's how I interpret the Dale Carnegie principles.
If you really would like to get better results in your human relationships, this book is essential reading. To skip this book would be like skipping reading and arithmetic in grade school. It contains essential tools that everyone needs to understand. Since these things are seldom taught in schools, this is a good place to start.
Modern gurus of human relationships and effectiveness like Stephen Covey and Tony Robbins have a substantial debt to Dale Carnegie. If you read all of them, you will tend to reinforce your new habits. I like the Covey and Robbins approaches as a complement to Carnegie, because both authors focus on having principles at the center of what you do. That will help reduce the risk of turning Carnegie into techniques that lead to suboptimal results, instead of a mutually reinforcing virtuous cycle for everyone.
Researchers consistently show that success in many fields (such as business, politics, and teaching) is very closely related to one's social skills. Many people will work very hard to be more successful, but skimp on the relationship aspects. That's a mistake. Work on the relationships first.
Enjoy having easier interactions with others, having more friends, being more influential on important subjects, being more open to being influenced by others, and leading where it needs doing!
How to Win Friends & Influence People.......2003-03-10
The book I read is How to Win Friends and Influence People, written by Dale Carnegie. One of the really interesting things about this book is that in the front cover on the book there is a section called "Nine Suggestions on How to Get the Most Out of This Book," (p. xx1-xxv) I think that this is a great thing to have in a self help book because when I first picked up the book I was thinking "How in the world will remember all of this about people?"
One of the great things I remember about this book is, "...that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound on any language." (p. 83) this is no the theme, but then again if you learn this and many other principles in this book you will reach the theme of this book yourself and agree. I think that the theme of the book is if you improve yourself then you will improve your quality of life and everyone's around you. I now really agree with this theme. I agree with it this theme because for years I never did any of the things talked about in this book and my life really [was bad]. I could not talk to people or deal with people well at all.
I would recommend this book to anyone who would like to improve themselves, their life, or improve relationships with just about anyone they know. This is one the first and best books of its kind. It has helped me and many of my associates.
How to Win Friends & Influence People.......2003-03-10
The book I read is How to Win Friends and Influence People, written by Dale Carnegie. One of the really interesting things about this book is that in the front cover on the book there is a section called "Nine Suggestions on How to Get the Most Out of This Book," (p. xx1-xxv) I think that this is a great thing to have in a self help book because when I first picked up the book I was thinking "How in the world will remember all of this about people?"
One of the great things I remember about this book is, "...that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound on any language." (p. 83) this is no the theme, but then again if you learn this and many other principles in this book you will reach the theme of this book yourself and agree. I think that the theme of the book is if you improve yourself then you will improve your quality of life and everyone's around you. I now really agree with this theme. I agree with it this theme because for years I never did any of the things talked about in this book and my life really[...]. I could not talk to people or deal with people well at all.
I would recommend this book to anyone who would like to improve themselves, their life, or improve relationships with just about anyone they know. This is one the first and best books of its kind. It has helped me and many of my associates.
Immediate Motivation.......2001-03-01
This book offers a lot of motivation, because besides inviting you to practice what you have read already, the changes of people's attitude they can also be seen that surrounds you as well as in yourself immediately.
Book Description
A qué obedece el éxito excepcional de este libro, siempre actual despues de tantos años. Es el arte de "don de gentes". Dale Carnegie no nos defrauda cuando nos enseña como se puede hacer amigos e influir sobre otros. Así podemos progresar en la vida.
Customer Reviews:
Excelente!.......2001-05-19
Después de más de 60 años de escrito, el libro del señor Dale Carnegie continúa vigente. Cómo es esto posible? Pues muy fácil, las excelentes ideas allí expuestas, no han sido adoptadas por muchos, a pesar de haber vendido millones de copias. El hombre común y corriente es fácilmente impresionable cuando se le presentan conceptos que prometen un cambio radical en su vida, sin embargo luego del entusiasmo inicial, todas estas ideas son olvidadas, tales son los casos famosos de libros de autores como Og Mandino o Wayne Dryer. En su libro, el señor Carnegie insiste en la re-lectura una y otra vez, y en la aplicación constante de los conceptos allí expuestos, ya que sabe que de otra manera sus palabras no dejarán huella. Las ideas que el señor Carnegie presenta en su texto son demasiado obvias, tan obvias que nadie las nota en su propia vida; sólo cuando el autor las muestra de tal manera que no se pueden negar, es en ese momento cuando el lector se enfrenta con la realidad. Todos nos sorprendemos ya que el señor Carnegie, apoyado en testimonios e historias de personajes famosos, logra mostrarnos tantos y tan distintos errores que cometemos a diario. Pero sobre todo, nos sorprendemos con la solución que nos presenta para superar esos errores. De manera magistral el autor apela al mismo egoísmo de cada uno para trabajar de manera inversa, es decir, hacerle creer a los demás que siempre hacemos lo que ellos quieren. Y al parecer esta solución funciona, y funciona tan bien que, a fuerza de fingir este comportamiento y de re-leer el texto, el individuo termina apropiando la idea de hacer que la otra gente se sienta importante.
Tal vez el mayor mérito lo logra el autor en el aspecto de la influencia sobre las personas, para ello propone unas reglas básicas de comportamiento, que de ser practicadas, conducen a un éxito en las relaciones interpersonales y de paso a conseguir cualquier cosa que uno se proponga. De todo esto, lo que causa mayor admiración al lector es darse cuenta que todas las personas sin distinción de raza, color, sexo, religión o condición social, tienen las mismas necesidades básicas, las mismas expectativas y por sobre todo, el interés de colocar el YO, el mí mismo por sobre todas las cosas y de cómo al lograr manipular este interés se puede "dominar" a los demás. Es interesante la lectura de este libro por todas las oportunidades que ofrece para el mejoramiento del trato con los demás, pero por sobre todo, porque el señor Carnegie en ningún momento intenta imponer sus ideas, simplemente sugiere, jugando de alguna manera con el mismo lector, a quién le aplica el mismo tratamiento de hacerlo sentir importante.
sencillamente un libro basico para empezar por una buena vez.......1999-09-28
desde mucho tiempo habia oido hablar de este libro y me parecia un poco cursi,hasta que me lo encontre en la casa de un amigo. inmediatamente empeze a leerlo y fue; unico el placer de darem cuenta algo tan sencillo, como el como comportarme estuviera tan mal en mi,cuando solo tenia que analizar y hacer las cosas mucho mejor, y hasta con menor esfuerzo. me abrio y sigue habriendo los ojos a muchos aspectos de mi vida vitales para mi desarrollo personal y con los demas. y no..es, que estuviera tan mal pero no hiba a llegar a ningun lado como hiba. en el cielo le lleguen mis gracias dr Dale
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Cómo ganar amigos e influir sobre las personas
Dale Carnegie
Manufacturer: Sudamericana
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Binding: Paperback
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How to Win Friends & Influence People
ASIN: 9500714558 |
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Como Ganar Amigos E Influir Sobre las Personas Para Chicas / How to Win Friends and Influence People for Teen Girls
Donna Dale Carnegie
Manufacturer: Sudamericana
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback
Interpersonal Relations
| Relationships
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Spanish
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| Nonfiction
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No-Ficción
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ASIN: 9500727501 |
Book Description
In the Autumn of 1863, a pair of remarkable military engagements took place on opposite sides of the Georgia-Tennessee border -- two battles marked by ferocity, genius, courage, astonishing ineptitude, and outrageous fortune that changed the course of the War Between the States.
John Bowers, the man who brought one of the Confederacy's most capable and eccentric commanders to life in Stonewall Jackson, now tells the riveting story of two brutal months in the life of a young nation at war with itself. From the opening volleys at Chickamauga Creek to the final, shocking outcome several miles north at Chattanooga, Bowers brilliantly recreates the fire and fury of the decisive battles of America's Civil War. More than a dramatic account of stunning master strokes and fatal missed opportunities, it is also the unforgettable story of real people: Grant, Longstreet, Sherman, the fiery gambler Nathan Bedford Forrest, George H. Thomas, the tormented Union officer despised and disowned by his Virginia family, and the tragic, tenacious General Braxton Bragg, who, through incompetence, miscalculation, and blind folly, almost singlehandedly doomed the Confederate cause.At Chickamauga, the South won a battle.At Chattanooga, they lost the war.
In the Autumn of 1863, a pair of remarkable military engagements took place on opposite sides of the Georgia-Tennessee border -- two battles marked by ferocity, genius, courage, astonishing ineptitude, and outrageous fortune that changed the course of the War Between the States.
John Bowers, the man who brought one of the Confederacy's most capable and eccentric commanders to life in Stonewall Jackson, now tells the riveting story of two brutal months in the life of a young nation at war with itself.From the opening volleys at Chickamauga Creek to the final, shocking outcome several miles north at Chattanooga, Bowers brilliantly recreates the fire and fury of the decisive battles of America's Civil War.More than a dramatic account of stunning master strokes and fatal missed opportunities, it is also the unforgettable story of real people: Grant, Longstreet, Sherman, the fiery gambler Nathan Bedford Forrest, George H. Thomas, the tormented Union officer despised and disowned by his Virginia family, and the tragic, tenacious General Braxton Bragg, who, through incompetence, miscalculation, and blind folly, almost single-handedly doomed the Confederate cause.
Customer Reviews:
This is a Hoot!.......2002-09-07
No one will ever accuse John Bowers of letting historical facts get in the way of telling a good story. Hyperbole? Lively? This is a good overview of the campaign, especially for beginners, but Bowers is really interested in telling dramatic stories about the major figures. But he needs to check his facts. For example, on page 101 he introduces Ambrose Bierce, a lieutenant in the 9th Indiana Infantry, and uses an excerpt from Bierce's post-war short story "Chickamauga" to illustrate the fighting. But on page 146 Bowers calls him Captain Bierce, an officer in an Ohio battery and chronicler of the battle. Although a serious student of the battle will do much better to read Steven Woodworth and Peter Cozzens, many will find Bowers very entertaining. Bowers is from East Tennessee and is the grandson of a Confederate cavalryman who fought in the battle. Bowers' best story in this book is in the Acknowledgements and concerns a Virginia patrician historian at the New York City Civil War Round Table. This alone is worth the cover price!
Battles that Doomed the Confederacy.......2001-11-09
I found this book to be very enjoyable reading. The book goes into depth about the battle that occured at Chickamauga and Chattanooga, but does not require the reader to be familiar with Civil War history. I found this book to be easy to read as well as enjoyable. Unfortunately, Bowers writes with a sympathetic viewpoint towards the CSA and goes into detail about Chickamauga (which was a confederate victory) but barely gleems over the battle of Chattanooga. good book for the lay reader, but you historians and civil war buffs may be disappointed.
An amazing read - relief to those who hate dry history.......2001-02-06
This book is one of the best history books I've read in ages. The story is presented in a gripping style and the characterizations and revelations are done majestically. Take for example this description of Leonidas Polk: "A handsome man with a full head of wavy graying hair and strong Roman features, he always seemed on the verge of giving a benediction or asking that the fried chicken be passed."
Mr. Bower's descriptions are entertaining and enlightening. Chicamauga isn't about strategy, it was a soldiers fight. What mattered was the character of the men involved. This book goes into the details. I cannot recommend this more highly.
Book shows case evidence for Union failty.......1999-10-21
This book i find shows a great deal of attention to the failure of the union. It also shows the haunting simularities, not noted in the book, between Chickamauga and Chancellorsville. Both battles included a gap inthe union lines being exploited. Over all, the book is a good read and My serious gratitude to the author for such a fine work.
This book is a historical nonfiction novel........1999-09-23
This book tells the story of two battles, which literall killed the cause of the Confederacy. Chickamauga was one of the bloodiest battles in the Civil War, and the Confederacy lost over 20000 men and the Union lost over 16000 men. Some men burned to death. They raked leaves back with sticks to try to keep the fires away from them. Many of the soldiers were found burned alive with the sticks still in their hands. After Chickamuaga the union retreated to Chattanooga. the Confederacy stayed and celebrated their win. Then finally the Confederacy came and besieged 500 civilian and 35000 Union men at chattanooga. the siege went on for days and days. Men died of starvation. Soldiers were forced to kill horses, dogs,and mules. Then Grant's army of 20000 showed up. Then not many days later, Sherman's army of 20000 showed up. They had a fight that was so furious that men were made armless and legless in a matter of seconds. The Confederacy was beaten back on the third day.
Bowers shows a real knack for writing and explaining the battles from the men's points of view. He could have not done better. He showed me facts, the men's point of view, and also who the generals in the battles were. He went into the tactics very well. He made sure the reader understood everything.
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The Smithsonian Book of North American Indians: Before the Coming of the Europeans (Library of American Art Series)
Philip Kopper
Manufacturer: Harry N Abrams
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Hardcover
Native American
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ASIN: 0810915103 |
Customer Reviews:
The review.......2003-11-23
This book proved very useful and informative when i was writing a paper about the arrival of the first people in north america.
A review.......2003-11-23
This book proved very useful when i was writing a paper about the arrival of the first people in North America.
Book Description
Lovely selection of different birds from Audubon's classic Birds of America appear in 4 different full-color 18" x 24" sheets, plus 4 matching gift cards. The sheets are shrink-wrapped in a sturdy 9¼" x 12¼" folder, with no staples to mar the attractiveness of the wrap.
Books:
- Creating a Joyful Birth Experience: Developing a Partnership with Your Unborn Child for Healthy Pregnancy, Labor, and Early Parenting
- Designing Apparel Through the Flat Pattern
- Diabetes, A-Z
- Doctor, What Should I Eat? : Nutrition Prescriptions for Over 70 Ailments in Which Diet...
- Don't Pick Up the Baby
- Donation of Time - The Supreme Charity
- Dr. Ruth's Guide to Erotic and Sensuous Pleasures
- Duty:: A Father, His Son, and the Man Who Won the War
- Fabric, Form and Flat Pattern Cutting
- Family and Social Policy in Japan: Anthropological Approaches (Contemporary Japanese Society)
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